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When should you stop for a glowworm?
When he has a red light.

Barber: Did you come in with a red scarf on?
Man: No.
Barber: Oh dear, I must have cut your throat.

My girlfriend is a beautiful redhead - no hair, just a red head.

Teacher: You seem to be exceedingly ignorant, Fred. Have you read Dickens?
Fred: No, sir.
Teacher: Have you read Shakespeare?
Fred: No, sir.
Teacher: Well, what have you read?
Fred: Er . . . er. . . I've red hair, sir.