Home - N - Noose Jokes

The sheriff looked at the man with a noose around his neck and said, "I'll tell you what, I'm going to give you a suspended sentence." The man said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you." The sheriff said, "Right boys, hang him!"

Why was the murderer hanged in the evening?
Because it was the six o'clock noose.

Why did the villain start thinking about the old times when he was on the gallows?
He felt noose-talgic.

Did you hear about the considerate hangman? He said, "Now, is the noose too tight?"

What do you call a Scottish sea monster who hangs people?
The Loch Noose Monster.