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Home - M - Mosquito Jokes

Why did the mosquito go to the dentist?
To improve his bite.

What has six legs, bites and talks in code?
A morse-quito.

How do you know if you have a tough mosquito?
If you slap him, he slaps you back.

What do you call A Tale of Two Mosquitoes?
A bite-time story.

Why is it best to be bitten quickly by one mosquito?
Because an itch in time saves nine.

Why are mosquitoes religious?
They prey on you.

Why are mosquitoes annoying?
Because they get under your skin.

What's the mosquitoes' favorite song?
I've Got You Under My Skin

What's the difference between a lawyer and a mosquito?
A mosquito drops off you when you die.

What did one mosquito say to another when they came out of the cinema?
Fancy a bite?

What do you call a mosquito on vacation?
An itch-hiker.

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mosquito.
Mosquito who?
Mosquito smoking soon.

Knock knock
Who's there?
Anna.
Anna who?
Anna-nuther mosquito

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a mosquito.
Go away, sucker.

Waiter, waiter! There's a mosquito in my soup.
Don't worry sir, mosquitoes have very small appetites.

Two mosquitoes were buzzing round when they saw a drunken man.
One said to the other, "You bite him ? I'm driving."

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