Home - F - Fruit Jokes

What's red and green and wears boxing gloves?
A fruit punch.

What is Dracula's favorite fruit?
Neck-tarines.

Teacher: If you saw me standing by a witch, what fruit would it remind you of?
Pupil: A pear.

First boy: She had a beautiful pair of eyes, her skin had the glow of a peach, her cheeks were like apples and her lips like cherries - that's my girl.
Second boy: Sounds like a fruit salad to me.

Why is history like a fruit cake?
Because it's full of dates.

Cookery teacher: Betty, what are the best things to put in a fruit cake?
Betty: Teeth!