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Waiter, this food isn't fit for a pig!
All right, I'll get you some that is.

Fred and Harry took their lunches to the local cafe to eat. "Hey!" shouted the proprietor. "You can't eat your own food in here!" "Okay," said Fred. So he and Harry swapped their sandwiches.

Fred: Our school must have very clean kitchens.
Harry: How can you tell? Brian: All the food tastes of soap.

My brother's on a seafood diet.
Really?
Yes, the more he sees food the more he eats.