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A woman went into a shoe shop. "I'd like some crocodile shoes, please," she said. "Certainly, ma'am," said the salesgirl. "How big is your crocodile?"

What do you get if you cross a crocodile with a flower?
I don't know, but I'm not going to smell it.

What's a crocodile's favorite game?
Snap!

First crocodile: My dad's so tough he can kill another crocodile by blinking his eyes.
Second crocodile: My dad's so tough it took Mum six hours in the microwave to cook him.