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Why does Dracula always travel with his coffin?
Because his life is at stake.
Did you hear someone has invented a coffin that just covers the head?
It's for people like you who're dead from the neck up!
What do vampires have at eleven o'clock every day?
A coffin break.
What kind of medicine does Dracula take for a cold?
Coffin and spluttering.
Doctor: Is your cough any better now?
Zombie: Yes, I've been coffin nicely for weeks, thank you.
A monster and a zombie went into the undertaker's. "I'd like to order a coffin for a friend of mine who has just died," said the monster. "Certainly, sir," said the undertaker, "but there was really no need to bring him with you."