Home - C - Clock Jokes

The teacher glanced up at the clock and then checked the time with his watch. "That clock's fast," he told the class. "I hope so, sir. If it isn't, it'll fall down and break."

You're late for work again !
Yes, I'm sorry, sir. I overslept.
I thought I told you to get an alarm clock.
I did, sir, but there are nine of us in our family.
What's that got to do with it?
The alarm was only set for eight!

Hickory dickory dock
The mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
And the rest got away with minor injuries

You are so ugly your face would stop a clock.
And yours would make one run.

The proud owner of an impressive new clock was showing it off to a friend. "This clock," he said, "will go for 14 days without winding."
"Really," replied his friend. "And how long will it go if you do wind it?