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Home - C - Clinton Jokes - One Liners

Clinton's Quickies - A collection of short jokes and one liners
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Kenneth Starr (before Grand Jury): Mr. President did you have FELLATIO in the White House.
Pres. Clinton: No, but we did have Pavarotti and Domingo once.

WHITEHOUSE ASSISTANT: Look Al Gore's in the Oval Office with one his pet endangered woodpeckers.
2ND ASSISTANT: No that's just Monica in her red beret.

Q: What's the difference between Clinton and a whale?
A: Whales mate for life.

Don't worry about Monica.
She'll be back on her knees in no time.

Q: What is the only thing worse than an incompetent liberal President?
A: A competent liberal President.

Q: How many Hillary Clintons does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One - she just holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

Starr wouldn't need to subpoena the Secret Service if the Pres. wasn't being secretly serviced!

Hillary (to President's Secretary): Where is my husband!?!
Secretary: He's up in his office working on Bosnia.
MEANWHILE UP IN THE OFFICE....
President (with a curvy blonde on his lap): Is your name really Bosnia, sweetheart...or is this one of Vernon's jokes?
Vernon: Would you like to meet her twin sister, Croatia?

Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and Joseph Stalin?
A: Some of Stalin's subjects admired him.

WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON
WILLIAM J. CLINTON
BILL J. CLINTON
B.J. CLINTON

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