Home - C - Chicken Jokes
On which side does a chicken have the most feathers?
On the outside.
An idiot decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with.
A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens because all of the first lot had died.
A month later he was back at the dealer for another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died.
"But I think I know where I'm going wrong," said the idiot, "I think I'm planting them too deep."
Billy's mother was called into the school one day by the principal. "We're very worried about Billy," he said. "He goes round all day cluck, cluck, clucking."
"That's right," said Billy's mother. "He thinks he's a chicken."
"Haven't you taken him to a psychiatrist?"
"Well, we would, but we need the eggs."
What do you call a witch who likes the beach but is scared of the water?
A chicken sand-witch.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was eggspelled.
Why should a school not be near a chicken farm?
So the pupils don't overhear fowl language.
Did you hear about Dr Frankenstein's invention for cooking breakfast?
He crossed a chicken with an electric organ and now he's got Hammond eggs.
The young teacher was complaining to her friends about how badly she was being paid. "We get a really poultry amount each month," she said.
"You mean 'paltry'," corrected one of her friends.
"No. I don't. I mean 'poultry'," replied the teacher.
"What I earn is chicken feed."
What do you call a team of chickens playing football?